Childhood and adolescence are critical periods marked by rapid growth, change, and challenges. Young people in Coquitlam face developmental hurdles, academic pressures, social adjustments, and emotional concerns that, if unaddressed, can significantly impact their mental health and well-being. Clearheart Counselling1 is dedicated to providing comprehensive child and youth counselling services tailored to the unique needs of […]
Tag Archives: relationships
counselling at clearheart in vancouver, therapy, trauma
Strengthening Relationships in Burnaby: Expert Couples Counselling Services at Clearheart Counselling
Relationships play a pivotal role in our lives, and maintaining healthy connections with our partners is integral to our mental and emotional well-being. As life progresses, couples in Burnaby may face different challenges that affect the level of intimacy, trust, and satisfaction in their relationships. At Clearheart Counselling1, we provide expert couples counselling services to […]
Often couples begin marriage counselling with the desire to have their side heard and to receive support for the wrongs that feel they are undergoing. Others are skeptical of the counselling process and wonder does marriage counselling work.
The first of three signs of codependency is that you fantasize that the person you are with is a better version of themselves. The reality of who they are is considerably different from what you fantasize. Pretending that the person is better than they are is enabling. It is an early sign of more advanced denial. Denial is when, despite your thoughts and feelings, you act entirely counter to them and over some time. Recognizing your needs and feelings is essential to being in a healthy relationship. If ignored, it could be a red flag that you are in a co-dependent relationship.
By defining what a boundary is you can understand how boundaries are applicable within relationships. A boundary is a product of your own internal emotional navigation system. This navigational system makes it clear on what your preferences are, what you like and what you don’t like. It also lets you understand what you’re comfortable with and what you’re not comfortable with. A boundary is actually an internal navigation system where from listening to yourself you know what your needs are.
counselling at clearheart in vancouver, relationships, trauma
One Size Does Not Fit All in Couples Counselling
One of my clients recently recommended me to her friend, who was in need of a couple’s therapist. When asked about my therapeutic approach, unsure of how to respond my client in turn queried me, “what kind of therapy is this, anyway?” We had been working together for some time, and she had been openly appreciative of the process, as well as her progress along the way. Yet the idea of how that process or progress was facilitated – puzzled her.
“What would happen if I stopped reacting to your reactions?” a client recently wondered amidst yet another recycled argument with her partner.
This truly was a breakthrough, and a turning point that may well change the entire course of their future together. The question was arrived at both genuinely and spontaneously – as though a light switch was flipped. These are the kind of turning points that mark real and lasting change – I certainly have experienced many of these moments in my own relationship journey, and I’m thrilled when I witness them for others. At last, when we finally ask the right question, rather than continuing to try to discover change from an old perspective, shifts happen.
Intimate relationships challenge us to grow, to become more self-aware. At points it may seem as though differences, rather than similarities, between you and your partner surface more readily. The loving connection is replaced with discontent and irritability. During these crucial junctions it’s important to first ask yourself – what do I need?
Commitment is often thought of as an event, rather than an ongoing process or practice. We make an overarching commitment such as living together, or getting married – yet there are many smaller commitments every day that determine the success of our relationship and personal happiness. Commitment is a process that evolves and changes over time – it’s more accurately thought of as a series of re-commitments, than as one big decision toward an outcome. Personally, I find this approach quite refreshing. If things go sideways in any area of my relationship, I look squarely at what happened and I re-commit to a new set of choices from where I am.